Moments

That’s the tragedy of growing up – knowing you’ll run out of feeling something new for the first time. The sad thing is, you get only so much of the moments, a handful of them if you’re lucky — and then you spend the rest of your life turning them in your head.

I think that’s why you meant as much to me as you did, that’s why I held on for so long. I didn’t know it back then but you were the last time I would ever feel anything new.

It’s Better To Be Single Than With Someone Who Doesn’t Understand You

Single or in a relationship — it’s the status that divides society, whether we care to admit it or not.

Regardless of which category you fall into, there will always be someone judging your choices. But lucky for you, it’s your life, and other people’s opinions are quite irrelevant.

At the end of the day, it’s about what you feel, which is why if you choose to be in a relationship, you better make sure it’s a great one.

Too many people settle because they feel as if that’s what they’re supposed to do. They put aside their priorities, their feelings, their goals and their dreams just to assuage expectations society has forced upon them.

How does this make any sense? Shouldn’t you want to be happy on your own? Isn’t it better to be comfortable with who you are than to worry about appeasing someone else?

How can you even be in a successful relationship if you aren’t fully secure with yourself?

If that wasn’t convincing enough, here are some more reasons it’s better to be single than with a person who doesn’t really understand or appreciate the real you.

You won’t feel bad about your lifestyle choices

Wouldn’t you rather spend your time developing yourself rather than defending yourself to someone else?

If your partner is committed to misunderstanding you, why are you even with him or her in the first place? That’s just a complete and utter waste of both of your time.


You’re not seeking approval

An unhealthy relationship is one that requires you to seek approval in anything and everything you do.

Why do you need approval from a partner in order to pursue any endeavor that’s important to you?


You’re not walking on eggshells

There’s no worse feeling than being uneasy and uncomfortable around someone you’re in a relationship with.

Isn’t the entire point of being with someone the fact that you can feel completely confident around him or her?


You don’t have to constantly explain yourself and your decisions

A decision is a decision, and that’s it. If it’s something you feel strongly enough about, that should be reason enough for your counterpart’s support.

Sure, it’s natural to ask questions, but that’s quite different than constantly having to defend yourself.


You don’t question yourself so much

The sign of an unhealthy relationship is one in which you never really feel confident in any decision or thought you make or have.

If you are constantly wondering if you are good enough, then you need to nix the source of these concerns, and if it’s your partner, so be it — you’ll be better off without him or her.


You can say whatever is on your mind without being judged

Your thoughts, beliefs and ideas are your own, so you should feel free to express them in any manner you deem fit. If someone has a problem with that, he or she can leave.


You create your own happiness

Your happiness is based solely on you and what you bring to your life.

It’s not dependent upon another person, especially when that person can’t even understand the choices you make in your life.


Your life choices are contingent upon you — and only you

When you’re single, your choices completely revolve around you and what you want to do.

If you’re in an unhealthy and non-understanding relationship, why would you even want to base your choices on someone else?


You don’t feel constantly disrespected

There is absolutely no reason to keep a person in your life, whether it’s a friend or significant other, who blatantly disrespects you.

The only way for relationships to grow and prosper is if there is mutual respect for both parties.


You don’t have to defend yourself

Why would you waste your precious time and energy defending actions you believe in?

Your partner should want to support you, not undermine everything you do. If that’s the case, it’s most likely time for you to reevaluate your relationship.


Decision-making is difficult enough when taking only your perspective into account

It’s hard enough to make a decision when the only person you’re considering in the equation is yourself.

Now add one more person into the mix, and that decision just got infinitely harder to make.


You only have so much energy

There are only so many hours in the day. Life is too short to spend it with someone who won’t make it better.

Exert your energy seeking out like-minded people who support you.


Being with someone shouldn’t make you feel more alone

If you feel more isolated with a partner than without one, you’ve got a serious issue on your hands. A significant other is supposed to enhance your life, not diminish it.

You want a partner in this life, not a parole officer, and if your SO starts to seem like the latter rather than the former, well, you know what decision you should be making…

Recovered!

Hi, loves! Sorry for lack of posts and updates. My account has been hacked. It went with minimal issues but let’s thank God, I’ve recovered it already and will publish every pending posts weeks ago.

I hope everyone’s fine and been enjoying Summer! 🙂

10 Signs na Isa Kang Dakilang Tamad

Just like lotsa peeps out there, most of us has to admit that we somehow have our lazy asses. And now as I continue to go on with this shizzton of reasons why we are, I want to do this in Taglish. :)😂😁👍👌

So eto na nga. You belong to the Lazy Club if:

1. YOU WOKE UP EARLY PLANNING TO DO THE CHORES PERO KUNG ANO ANONG WALANG KWENTA INUNA MO.

Eto ka ba? Yung nagising ka ng 7am then you want to be productive for the day so nag iisip ka sa sarili mo ng anong mga dapat mong gawin. Kahit bago ka matulog kagabi mo sabi mo sa sarili mo gigising ka ng maaga. Pag gising mo naman inuna mo pa tingnan ang cellphone mo kung nag reply na ba ang taong nilalandi mo or kung nag good morning na ba si crush sayo. Mag popost ka pa sa Twitter/Facebook mo. Hindi mo namalayan alas dose na ng tanghali at wala ka na nasimulan. So what’s your plan, teh? Kama kama nalang? Tapos makakatulog ka na. Iisipin mo na wala ka na gana gumawa. Sa halip na nakapag laba ka nalipasan ka na ng sinag ng araw.

2. NANONOOD KA NG TV PERO AYAW MO NG PALABAS. KAYA LANG MALAYO YUNG REMOTE SO GINUGUSTO MO NALANG DIN YUNG PINAPANOOD MO.

Aaminin ko na. Hindi ako ‘to. Hahaha. (Ako yung number 1. 👆)

So yun nga. Let’s say katatapos mo lang gumawa ng isang bagay or kauuwi mo lang. Umupo ka sa living room nyo habang nanonood ang mga kasama mo. Tapos umalis na sila (baka kasi kakain na, may pasalubong ka e.) Eventually you realized ang corny corny ng palabas at ayaw mo nito. Ang problema, malayo ang remote sayo. Nga nga ka nalang. Hindi mo na nilipat. Tamad ka eh.

3. IF YOU HAVE TO SAY SOMETHING MORE THAN ONCE, IT’S NOT WORTH THE ENERGY.

Nagkukuwento ka sa best friend mong wala nang ibang inatupag kundi itext ng itext yung boyfriend nyang wala namang pakealam sa kanya. So yun, kwento ka lang ng kwento. Mejo engs ka na nga kasi kahit alam mong hindi sya nakikinig kwento ka pa din. Pag sinabi nyang ulitin mo ulit, at ulitin mo pa ng ulitin hanggang sa maintindihan nyang bruha sya, hindi mo na uulitin kasi tinatamad ka na. Nakakatamad nga naman yun friend.

4. YUNG KUMUHA KA NG SOMETHING SA FRIDGE NYO TAPOS PAG MAY NAHULOG, SISIPAIN MO SA ILALIM.

(Bwiset ka bakit ginagawa mo yun? Hindi pa ako sa level mo. Haha)

So, eto yung mga taong ubod ng tamad na hindi manlang maiyuko ang mga likod nila para limutin yung kung ano man yung nahulog dun.

5. YUNG SA HALIP NA SA DINING TABLE KA KAKAIN, KUKUHA KA NG PAGKAIN TAPOS SA KAMA KA KAKAIN HABANG NANONOOD NG TV.

Eto yung mga lazyasses na kakapanood ng paborito nilang love teams na sobrang baduy naman, nagkakandarapa na sila sa panonood. Hindi na nila pinapansin mga magulang nila sa tuwing sasabihin nito na “Nak, lika ka na sa mesa. Kakain na.” Ang gagawin mo pupunta ka nga sa mesa. Kukuha ka ng pagkain sa plato. Babalik ka sa kwarto at dun ka kakain. KAGATIN KA SANA NG LANGGAM SA SINGIT.

6. SA HALIP NA AYUSIN MO KAMA MO AFTER MO MATULOG, HINDI MO GINAWA AT INIISIP MO NA MAGUGULO DIN NAMAN ULIT.

Yung ang dami dami mong unan na nagtatanggalan na yung cases at yung sheets ng kama mo hindi na pantay sa sobrang likot mong matulog tapos yung blanket mo nasa floor na yung kalahati.

Pero dahil sobrang tamad ka iiwasan mo nalang tingnan. Ang mindset mo kasi, “bakit ko pa lilinisin kung magugulo din naman?”

Grabe wala naman bang ipis dyan?

7. NATAPON YUNG TUBIG SA FLOOR NYO, HINDI MO MANLANG PUPUNASAN KASI MATUTUYO DIN NAMAN.

Yung uminom ka ng tubig. Nag salin ka mula sa pitcher pero dahil hindi ka nakatingin kasi aanga anga ka din minsan, natapon si water. Kahit nabasa yung paa mo, yung paa mo lang pupunasan mo. Yung floor hindi na kasi ang layo ng rug or ng mop.

8. MAY SINEARCH KA SA GOOGLE AND YOU CANNOT FIND IT ON THE FIRST PAGE, YOU TELL YOURSELF “IT DOESN’T EXIST.”

May hinahanap kang information about something pero dahil tamad ka din, hanggang first page ka nalang ng Google at hindi mo na itinuloy ang pag click ng mouse.

9. YOU SCREW THE “TERMS AND CONDITIONS”

Everyone’s guilty. Aminin!

Hindi ko na pahahabain pa ito pero nakakatamad naman talaga basahin yung shtloads of agreements na yun. Sa halip na nakapag blower ka na ng buhok mo, hindi mo pa din tapos basahin yung sobrang haba na yun. Minsan gusto mo nalang sisihin kung sino gumawa at nagpauso eh.

10. HINAHAYAAN MO NALANG.

Yung control number ng cellphone mo kunware is 09171628361810191615. So yun. Tamad ka. Hindi mo binasa lahat eh. Tamad ka talaga.

So there you go guys. Thanks for reading. Hindi mo naman siguro babasahin ‘to if hindi ka curious kung tamad ka din. Okay lang yan, but not too much okay? 😁:oops: Thanks, lazy fat ass.

When You Love Someone And He/She Doesn’t Love You Back

I was asked yesterday by a friend from High School a question (Bakit di nya ako mahal, love ko naman sya?) while we were talking over the phone. Apparently, the question also hit me a bit so I’ve afterwards gave her my hugot answers.

Let’s be real, it’s easier to think it’s somebody or something else’s fault tan admit that you need to change — and can change, grow develop, become more exciting, more inspiring, more positive, less negative, less antagonistic, less pushy, less needy, less rigid in your thinking and ways, less predictable, more intimate, more loving. It begins and it ends with who YOU are. 

It is important to know and love yourself first before the man or woman you love can love you.

It’s one thing to love yourself and know that you are lovable and love worthy and it’s another to be able to express that “best in you” in ways that make others want to know and love you too.

The common approach practiced by many people (and taught by many dating and relationship experts, as far as I can remember) is to decide on the kind of person you want to attract (remember those “What I want my partner to be” lists) and then try to figure out how to get him/her. And may be you’re one of those people who’ve been reading books, magazines and internet articles. You learned and maybe have implemented a few of those hard to get hold of “secret techniques” (put on your best dress/shirt, give your best smile, deliver your best pick-up line or flirtatious moves) and done and said all the romantic stuff (like “yes, honey” or “please, baby” or “thank you, love” etc) but still no joy.

A few good talks, great laughs, memorable times spent together etc., but as you’re falling in love with this wonderful guy or girl,  the other person pulls away. Your immediate reaction  is to desperately try to do this or that “technique”, but the more you try to show you love, the more the other person doesn’t want you. Ironic!!

You’re like… What happened? You were just being yourself alright but you were DOING the dating savvy, equipped with the newest YOU. Whatever is inside of you (insecurity, doubts, anger, shame, sense of inadequacy, neediness or low self-worth etc.) popped up like unwanted ads on your dating/relationship status. The other person didn’t like WHO you were selling and evetually pulled back. Sad.

Anyways, if you’re constantly worrying or analyzing or scheming or manipulating etc., with the hope of “getting it right” with a particular person, you are not BEING yourself but instead DOING yourself.

When this happens there is a “DISCONNECT” in who you are honestly trying to be on the surface and “who you really feel you are” on a deeper level. You and the man or woman you love, may not even realize the exact moment the “disconnect” begins to happen but somehow the other person starts to withdraw attachments or simply cuts bail and runs. You are left wondering “where the hell did I go wrong this time, I was just being myself with him/her?” That’s sad and yet painful. You conclude that the problem must be with him/her and move on to the next person, only for the same thing to happen again, and again, and again…

If something is happening to you over and over, it’s not the people you date/have a relationship with, or the techniques you’re using, it’s YOU! Kainis ka!

You’ve got to lose yourself to find YOU.

Losing yourself means forgetting what WAS and get excited about what IS. Gets? This requires you to re-evaluate yourself (and your beliefs about dating, love, relationships, intimacy, sex etc.,) from time to time and see yourself in a new light every single time.

Losing yourself to find you also requires you to get rid of expectations.

Many of my friends don’t like it when I tell them, “The cause of your pain is not him/her”. He isn’t hurting you. You’re hurting yourself. She doesn’t upset you. You upset yourself”.

I can see a look of panic in their faces because this is not how they’re used to thinking about their frustration, pain or hurt.

In other words, your (or our, in this matter) expectations are causing you to feel the way you feel. If you go around “just being yourself” without any expectations then you’re free to receive with open hands.

For example, if someone doesn’t call after the so called three-day dating rule, you’re not upset. If he or she calls the very next day, you don’t start worrying and overanalyzing if that is a good or bad sign. Remember, people are not placed on earth to meet your expectations.

If you can get into the spirit of BEING yourself instead of DOING yourself, you’ll find that you love yourself more. There is a natural ease about you which makes it easy for the people you love and want in your life to love and want to keep you in their lives.

Before, I have this so-called over inflated version of who I really am.. I always tend to have very high and often unrealistic expectations, standards, ideals and view of things. I also think and expect the other person to think, feel and behave like me when in a similar situation. And I often feel hurt, confused, betrayed.

It was hard but I think is better than having a low opinion of yourself. I mean, these people tend to have lower expectations or they harbour unsaid expectations because they don’t believe  they’re worth of anything more. They say and do things out of the need to be loved, liked, or wanted — contributing to the unrealistic expectations other people have of them.